Columbia Pictures announced today that it’ll add another drop to the comic-book-to-movie bucket and bring The Green Hornet to movie theaters. The Green what?

In case you’re not 70+ years old: The Green Hornet is a crime fighting guy wearing a 30 cent mask and fedora along with his sidekick Kato. The character dates back to 1936 and came from the same minds that brought you the still-just-as-hip Lone Ranger. The Green Hornet made an attempt back in 1966 to be a television show but lasted just one season. (Pamela Anderson’s series “Stacked” lasted longer than that.) The television version starred Bruce Lee as Kato. Now if Bruce Lee couldn’t save a show I don’t know what they think could make it work as a movie.

Regardless of why this won’t work, the owner of Green Hornet rights, Neal Moritz, clearly ecstatic to have finally made money off his poor investment, had this to say:

“With the radio show, television program, comic books and novels, there is ample source material to bring this classic crime fighter to life.”

Does anyone remember when they made The Shadow into a movie? It at least had Alec Baldwin in the lead role as the telepathic hero and it still sucked. So now take away super mental powers of confusion and illusion and replace them with a revolver and cheap mask and you’ve got… The Green Hornet!