I think I read about this at the end of the Bible. After this gets released there should be three more horsemen and then that’s it, we’re all done for. How does this crap even get made, much lease released?? Everything about it is completely absurd.

Let me back up. Dead or Alive (DOA) was originally a fighter video game way back in the day (1996), like Mortal Kombat or Street Fighter. It than progressed through several revisions and sequels and revisions of sequels and sequels of revisions until it came to Dead or Alive Xtreme Beach Volleyball (2003). This is pretty much where things got silly. Just like the title says, it was about volleyball, well that and bouncing breasts. Seriously.

So here we are today with DOA quickly approaching a release date (supposedly June 15 or 22) after setting dormant since completion back in mid-2005. What really blows my mind is the budget this thing got… $21 million!! Hey Hollywood, I just took a dump in a bag and am ready to sell it for about $21 million. That seems to be the going price these days.

Actress Jamie Pressly was sadly also involved in this stinker, but she didn’t think it’d ever be released. In an interview which took place before the recent decision to actually release DOA Pressly she expressed her lack of surprise of it not being released:

I can’t say that I’m upset that it didn’t come out. We were working with a director, Corey Yuen, who is one of the number one action and marital arts directors in the world. That’s why we did the film. In the process of filming, a lot of bad stuff came up and happened, being that we were over in China in little small villages, you didn’t have the means necessary to get things done like you do when you’re in Hollywood. So I think between things getting lost in translation because there were four dialects going on at all times, or languages I should say, and the lack of necessities, it just didn’t turn out the way that it should have. And I think for gamers, a lot of the stuff was inaccurate because they changed it along the way.

Just in case you are a sucker for punishment, here is the DOA movie trailer below:

Source: Rotten Tomatoes