In what same may consider a blessing for televisions and viewers everywhere, it looks like Rosie O’Donnell will not be taking over at the Price Is Right following Bob Barker’s recent departure after 35 years. Last week Rosie reported that she was going to sit down and talk with the show’s producers on Friday. Unfortunately Fortunately, it looks like it won’t be working out like she had hoped. Rosie left a video message on her website detailing the results:

“Here’s the thing. I don’t really need a job. I’m in a weird position. I don’t need the money. I know you’re not allowed to talk about money in America, but I’m just saying I don’t.”

That’s nice Rosie. Once again it’s the “Heteros” and American society repressing your desired way of life. Actually, there’s no problem talking about money in America. I think the issue is that America doesn’t like you talking. At all. Ever.

Rosie goes on with her excuses by saying the location just wouldn’t work either. The producers wanted her to move out to LA where the show is taped, but Rosie says she just wasn’t willing to uproot her family for the show. Sure, sure. It sounds more like that time Angelina Jolie tried to hit on me at the bar by asking if she could buy me a drink. After I turned her down, again, she told her friends that I already had a drink, which was a total lie. I just didn’t want to wake up the next morning and realize I had adopted thirty kids in a drunken stupor! Nice try Angelina, nice try.