In what can only be described as “thank goodness for beauty” was the bumbling, rambling mouth mush from Miss Teen South Carolina, Lauren Caitlin Upton this past weekend. When asked why she thought a fifth of American’s can’t locate the United States on a world map Upton gave a nearly poetic waxing fitting of the exact educational issues she was trying to address. But let’s not be so hard on her. When you’re busy trying to look that good it’s hard to keep straight the differences between the United States, South Africa, and Iraq. I mean, everyone knows they all accept the Euro, so what’s the big deal?

Speaking of the Euro, at least she wasn’t a Parisian growing up in South Carolina. People over there need to be careful or they could fall right off the edge of the Earth.

Update: Lauren Caitlin Upton came back on air this morning to defend her commentary. In a visit to the Today Show Upton explained her situation:

The question clearly caught Upton by surprise. She explained Tuesday that she was so overwhelmed by the moment she barely heard any of the question.

“Everything did come at me at once,” she said. “And I made a mistake — everybody makes a mistake — I’m human. Right when the question was asked of me, I was in shock … I would love to re-answer that question.”

Curry obliged, reading the entire question as it had been asked during the pageant. This time, Upton was ready.

“Personally, my friends and I, we know exactly where the United States is on a map,” she said. “I don’t know anyone else who doesn’t. If the statistics are correct, I believe there should be more emphasis on geography in our education so people will learn how to read maps better.”

Well I just took one look at her picture and forgave her.

Thanks to Scott for passing these videos along.

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