I admit that I am a Big Brother junkie. I love it, and I love to hate it. Sometimes I just want to reach through the TV and strangle a Houseguest or two. Maybe, seeing Houseguests make incredibly bad decisions makes me feel better about my life? As bad as things may seem sometimes, I’ve never had to go on a slop diet. I’ve never called an autistic child a “retard” on national TV, and I’ve never had to share a house with an aging Penthouse Pet who is certifiably INSANE. But, I digress. I tend to judge just how good a season of Big Brother is by my aggravation from watching it. This must be the greatest season ever.

Natalie. Poor, poor, pathetic Natalie. I want to just jingle some keys in front of her face and tell her everything will be ok. I want to shake Natalie and say “HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU.” I want to assure Natalie that if she just voted to evict someone she probably shouldn’t vote that person right back into the house. Of course, it’s hard to view Nat as a threat because of her boneheaded moves. Now, with Matty gone, she might have to actually think on her own. That could create a wormhole in time and space, destroying all matter in the universe, so let’s not think about that just yet.

I’ve got some news for James: you’re not as cute and affable as you think you are. You and Chelsia are huge targets, and I can’t wait for you both to go. James’ convoluted logic in ousting Matt puts him squarely in the “big, fat liar” camp that he so righteously condemned. That’s TWICE that James lied to Matt about not putting him on the block. My only solace in this is that James will hopefully experience a second (and final) eviction and all the stress and emotion that goes with it. Yes, I’m that petty.

I’ve got to give credit to Ryan, he is the golden boy in the house. Just when it seems like he is a goner, he somehow escapes unscathed. He has a guaranteed pass this coming week with Adam as HoH, and if his secret alliance with Josh actually holds up, he could find himself going much further in the game. I thought the move of putting up James last week was brilliant, and it did work in getting perhaps the strongest player in the game evicted.

I’m not sure how much longer Sheila can avoid the chopping block. She is a major source of stirring up trouble and has a way of convincing people to change their game plans based on her whimsical, spur-of-the-moment, mood swings. Pretty much the only thing that is guaranteed is that Sheila tells you she is voting for you to stay, then she will actually vote the opposite. That is going to catch up with her this week, when Ryan pieces together the vote count. If Ryan had done the same to her, just imagine her reaction.

I’ll tell you now, but I think Adam is going to win this game. He’s got some kind of Rain Man-esque talent of answering those questions tonight, he hasn’t pissed anyone off (besides Sheila of course), and he’s been as honest as one could be and still compete in the game. The real test will be this coming week. Can he nominate people without making enemies? Jess mastered that last season, it’s definitely possible.

Steven is a guest author and great contributor at the Big Brother 9 Forum.

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